levelshift: (sus)
Accelerator ([personal profile] levelshift) wrote2024-04-26 02:03 pm

Etraya Inbox



un: Accelerator
[Text | Video | Audio | In-person]

hexcope: (pic#17666621)

1/2

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-06 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
[He just started figuring out Damian, he's on a roll.]

All this time...
hexcope: (pic#17567018)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-06 03:18 am (UTC)(link)
They let a convicted felon run a city?
hexcope: (3)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-06 04:12 am (UTC)(link)
[Maybe it's a good thing it's not video because he's rolling his eyes at this point.]

Oh, please. I'm not buying this anymore.

You took on a role you didn’t want. With the original leader who let problems get worse and fester over the years gone, you decided to try and make the best of it by using your status as unquestioned leader to make sweeping changes for the better, cut out the corruption, end the shady deals, but then it turns out you can’t do all that so easily. There’s pushback you can’t get around, and so you have to make some concessions. All the while, there’s other nations at your door trying to get a hold of what put your city on the map— the advancements, the research— by whatever means necessary.

Did I sum that up right?
hexcope: (pic#17572216)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-06 06:20 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, well...

What I described was actually my last week in Piltover. Beat for beat, concessions included. So maybe you don't get to call yourself a monster, unless you want to call me one too.
hexcope: (pic#17607876)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-06 11:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I was pushed into joining the Piltover Council- our highest form of government. Only a few days in, I had the acting Council head, my former professor, removed. He had been there for decades. So... I became the leader of the Council. I had been trying to fix things- suspicious shipments, enforcer corruption- but if I didn't cut deals with the elites, I would have lost control of everything. So I cut deals; turned them around to my own benefit... for Hextech. Meanwhile, Zaun's throwing riots because I shut down access between our cities, and a Noxian army arrives to gently persuade me to make weapons.

Sick of me yet? There's still more.
hexcope: (pic#17578096)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 12:07 am (UTC)(link)
[Jayce doesn't keep going just yet. All that happens for a few seconds is a long inhale and a shaky exhale.]

This is the part where... I'd understand if you don't want to speak with me again.

Pressure's building up. There had been a theft of my research and gemstone- that thing I had told you about, harnesses magical energy? We know the thief- Jinx. She works for Silco. No one seems to want to take action against who we know is responsible, who dodged investigation for years because of that same enforcer corruption. They want a peaceful negotiation, and I... I'm tired of the back and forth. Of no solutions working. So I'm convinced to lead an illegal strike on Silco's factories, and... I made a weapon. I used it. I lost control of myself.

[Another pause. He feels the acid rise up in his throat. It still doesn't get easier to talk about.]

He looked around your age.
hexcope: (pic#17574899)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 01:14 am (UTC)(link)
[It does sound like Accelerator's going down a certain path with that comment. Jayce holds his breath, swallows hard. He's only told Caitlyn about this. She knows him— would know it was an accident. He didn't have the courage to tell anyone else, until now. It felt... important to admit, here. Even if it means he's going to lose someone.

Jayce waits for the other shoe to drop, but then it doesn't. It's not... blame. It's understanding.
]

Yeah.

[Why he reacted so strongly about kids being hurt, mangled, killed. All the guilt he feels spread through every single cell, he could never do something like that again. How could anyone do it over, and over, and over?]
hexcope: (pic#17578095)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
[...And there's the other shoe.]

Y— You think I don't know that?! There were- a dozen ... horrible, chemtank zombies, and they moved so fast, I-I just kept firing—

[He sounds like he's on the verge of tears again.]
hexcope: (pic#17725881)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 02:17 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't- think there'd be children there!

[His voice cracks, and he turns off his audio channel. He shouldn't have said anything. He fucked up.]
hexcope: (pic#17725913)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
[And just like when he tried to speak to Vi about this, that same reaction. Of course you should feel guilt. You've always been responsible for this. Whether you do it yourself, or just by putting your head in the sand, you're responsible for this.

If Accelerator meant for this to be reassuring, it does the dead opposite. When Jayce eventually turns his audio back on, he's quietly furious.
]

I didn't tell you all this so you could psychoanalyze me.
Edited 2025-03-07 02:52 (UTC)
hexcope: (pic#17565852)

[personal profile] hexcope 2025-03-07 03:11 am (UTC)(link)
And this is where you say you did it, too? Do you want me to berate you for it too, like you just did to me?

I don't play these kinds of games. Say you can't stand me, and we just part ways. I'm not looking for lesson from the more experienced murderer on how to feel guilt until the day I die.

LESSONS* ugh

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