( she had calculated everything to ensure everyone was safe, so was it her fault? she doesn't think she miscalculated, even though her mother before her had, and that's why that joyous moment didn't hurt 37 as much. however, hearing accelerator say it that they didn't listen makes it sound like a choice they made, and that eats her up inside. she feels sick, something in her stomach is turning as she tries to figure out what it was that they didn't want to listen.
they are a small island, all they had was each other, but even through the death and bloodshed... 37 had promised she would find the truth and fix it all.
but even with the truth, she has found herself here with a threat looming over her head. what if she can't save what's left after all, what if this place is to mock her having already witnessed her friends joyously celebrate in the rain? it's like she can see the rain again in the forefront of her mind, but no, that's only tears swelling up in the corner of her eyes as she tilts her head down to avoid being seen. her hair, like a waterfall, hangs down like a curtain to keep her expression hidden.
she hears him and she fears for him, one miscalculation has intense consequences and she finds herself exhaling a shaky breath. her cheeks warm, something wet rolling down one as she sniffles just a little bit. and what if one day he dies and does not return? what if he's much like her recent experience with the emanation because she doesn't recall any geometrical shape left behind when her friends, who didn't listen, allowed it to take them.
instead of grabbing for her hair, she wraps her arms around herself, palms resting at the curve of her upper arms where her nails dig into flesh there. )
I... I don't want to put you in danger. I don't want to put 6 in danger, either. I don't know what to do if I make a mistake or if someone changes their mind.
( those were her friends, those were the people she laughed and smiled with only days ago until.
she had already cried, but when she thinks about it, how fresh it is to her memory. within her equations, she's never thought she would have to take away important individuals in her life, or they would personally factor themselves away from it. )
cw: suicide talk
they are a small island, all they had was each other, but even through the death and bloodshed... 37 had promised she would find the truth and fix it all.
but even with the truth, she has found herself here with a threat looming over her head. what if she can't save what's left after all, what if this place is to mock her having already witnessed her friends joyously celebrate in the rain? it's like she can see the rain again in the forefront of her mind, but no, that's only tears swelling up in the corner of her eyes as she tilts her head down to avoid being seen. her hair, like a waterfall, hangs down like a curtain to keep her expression hidden.
she hears him and she fears for him, one miscalculation has intense consequences and she finds herself exhaling a shaky breath. her cheeks warm, something wet rolling down one as she sniffles just a little bit. and what if one day he dies and does not return? what if he's much like her recent experience with the emanation because she doesn't recall any geometrical shape left behind when her friends, who didn't listen, allowed it to take them.
instead of grabbing for her hair, she wraps her arms around herself, palms resting at the curve of her upper arms where her nails dig into flesh there. )
I... I don't want to put you in danger. I don't want to put 6 in danger, either. I don't know what to do if I make a mistake or if someone changes their mind.
( those were her friends, those were the people she laughed and smiled with only days ago until.
she had already cried, but when she thinks about it, how fresh it is to her memory. within her equations, she's never thought she would have to take away important individuals in her life, or they would personally factor themselves away from it. )
Please don't die, please don't leave. I'll try to... understand every equation.